Off topic: EURO-ENGLISH
Thread poster: Kimmy
Kimmy
Local time: 08:53
Italian to English
+ ...
Sep 28, 2005

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replacethe soft "c".
Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.

The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make
words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the newspelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, vevil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.


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Catherine Bolton  Identity Verified
Local time: 00:53
Member (2002)
Italian to English
+ ...
Thanks for the laugh! Sep 28, 2005

I vil try to ber zat advis in mind.
Catherine


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Can Altinbay  Identity Verified
Local time: 18:53
Japanese to English
+ ...
But you have to have tho long words Sep 28, 2005

Kimmy wrote:

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.


Nine, ve vil be Gegermansprekken.


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NancyLynn
Canada
Local time: 18:53
Member (2002)
French to English
+ ...

Moderator of this forum
good, into an another eurolanguage! Sep 28, 2005

I'd read this before, with the French taking over the eurolanguage.

Very funny, especially when you haven't seen it for a while.

Can Altinbay wrote:

Nine, ve vil be Gegermansprekken.


Very funny Can!

Nancy


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Clarisa Moraña  Identity Verified
Argentina
Local time: 19:53
Member (2002)
English to Spanish
+ ...
The same for the Spanish language Sep 28, 2005

It's really funny! Did you know that there is a similar proposal written in Spanish? One must be a translation of the other one.



I'll study the new rules in order to improve my English and be understood everywhere!

Regards,

Clarisa


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Russell Jones  Identity Verified
United Kingdom
Local time: 23:53
Member (2004)
Italian to English
Prepare for some flak!!! Sep 28, 2005

Kimmy, You might like to see what happened when I posted this text some time ago. Some people didn't find it at all funny!
http://www.proz.com/post/98403#98403


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Catherine Bolton  Identity Verified
Local time: 00:53
Member (2002)
Italian to English
+ ...
Hadn't seen that! Sep 29, 2005

I hadn't seen that posting and was surprised by the brouhaha over a "lighter side" forum!
Catherine

Russell Jones wrote:

Kimmy, You might like to see what happened when I posted this text some time ago. Some people didn't find it at all funny!
http://www.proz.com/post/98403#98403


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Kimmy
Local time: 08:53
Italian to English
+ ...
TOPIC STARTER
As I posted I though that it may meet with Sep 29, 2005

derision but.....

as was always pointed out in the other thread - this IS the Lighter side of Translation is it not?

I personally believe that to find it offensive a little OTT but then again.........

We can't get too bogged down in the seriousness of our professional life... or can we?

Hey! When I first received it I thought it was bona fide and I was devastated until I got to the third change! Then the light went on in the "mansarda"..... Derrrrr...


Ahhhhhh, I feel that if people find things like this offensive they shouldn't come into the Lighter Side Forum!


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