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Off topic: A Glossary of Medical Terms
Thread poster: PB Trans
PB Trans

Local time: 17:04
French to English
+ ...
Feb 1, 2006

Benign................What you be after you be eight.
Artery................The study of paintings.
Bacteria..............Back door to cafeteria.
Barium................What doctors do when patients die.
Cesarean Section......A neighbourhood in Rome.
Catscan...............Searching for kitty.
Cauterize.............Made eye contact with her.
Colic.................A sheep dog.
Coma..................A punctuation mark.
D & C.................Where Washington is.
Dilate................To live long.
Enema.................Not a friend.
Fester................Quicker than someone else.
Fibula................A small lie.
Genital...............Non-Jewish person.
G.I. Series...........World Series of military baseball.
Hangnail..............What you hang your coat on.
Impotent..............Distinguished, well known.
Labour Pain...........Getting hurt at work.
Medical Staff.........A Doctor's cane.
Morbid................A higher offer than I bid.
Nitrates..............Cheaper than day rates.
Node..................Was aware of
Outpatient.... .......A person who has fainted.
Pap Smear..... .......A fatherhood test.
Pelvis................Second cousin to Elvis.
Post Operative........A letter carrier.
Recovery Room.........Place to do upholstery.
Rectum................Darn near killed him.
Secretion.............Hiding something.
Seizure...............Roman emperor.
Tablet................A small table.
Terminal Illness......Getting sick at the Bus Station
Tumor.................More than one.
Urine.................Opposite of you're out.
Varicose..............Near by/close by.
Vein..................Conceited.

[Edited at 2006-02-01 01:48]


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De la Vera Cruz
Argentina
Local time: 14:04
English to Spanish
Excellent! Feb 1, 2006

You made my day!!!



(Sorry, can't stop laughing!)

Verónica


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Sven Petersson  Identity Verified
Sweden
Local time: 18:04
English to Swedish
+ ...
Addendum Feb 1, 2006

Rabies ..... Jewish priests

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Jack Doughty  Identity Verified
United Kingdom
Local time: 17:04
Member (2000)
Russian to English
+ ...
More addenda Feb 1, 2006

Or should I say Appendix?

Anus……………………It isn’t us!
Auricle……………….Foretells the future.
Bacillus…………………Back door of Cilla’s house.
Castration…………..Allocation of plaster casts
Humerus………………The funny bone
Menstruation…………A mathematical term to do with measurement.
Stomatologist……….A stomach specialist.
Testes…………………People taking a test.
Urethra………………..You’re Ezra, and you speak with a lisp.
Vertebra……………..A brassière for a woman with one breast above the other.
Vulva…………………..A Swedish car.
X-ray…………………Used to be Ray, but he’s changed his name.


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Mieke Tulp  Identity Verified
Netherlands
Local time: 18:04
English to Dutch
Thanks! Feb 1, 2006

Thanks for putting a smile on my face. Great way to start the day.
Mieke


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Mariana Toscano  Identity Verified
Argentina
Local time: 14:04
English to Spanish
Very funny! Feb 1, 2006

Hi Pina!

Great Glossary... I think I might use it in my next medical translation!!

My client will love it, don´t you think?

X-Ray... excellent Jack!!

SaludoZ, Marian.





[Edited at 2006-02-01 12:35]


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PB Trans

Local time: 17:04
French to English
+ ...
TOPIC STARTER
Brilliant! Feb 1, 2006

Jack Doughty wrote:

Or should I say Appendix?

Anus……………………It isn’t us!
Auricle……………….Foretells the future.
Bacillus…………………Back door of Cilla’s house.
Castration…………..Allocation of plaster casts
Humerus………………The funny bone
Menstruation…………A mathematical term to do with measurement.
Stomatologist……….A stomach specialist.
Testes…………………People taking a test.
Urethra………………..You’re Ezra, and you speak with a lisp.
Vertebra……………..A brassière for a woman with one breast above the other.
Vulva…………………..A Swedish car.
X-ray…………………Used to be Ray, but he’s changed his name.


Those are brilliant, Jack!


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Kevin Kelly  Identity Verified
Local time: 12:04
Member (2005)
Russian to English
+ ...
Thank you Pina and Jack! Feb 1, 2006

These are all wonderful! Some of them I've seen before, others are new.

Somewhere in the bowels of my hard drive are more of these gems. I'll dig them up soon and share them.

Kevin


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