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Off topic: A bad day is...
Thread poster: Odette Grille

Odette Grille  Identity Verified
Local time: 08:24
English to French
+ ...
Aug 18, 2003

Just for a good laugh :

>You know its going to be a bad day ahead when...

>You put your bra on backwards and it fits better.

>You call suicide prevention and they put you on hold.

>Your birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles.

>You want to put on the clothes you wore home from the party and there aren't any.

>You turn on the news and they are showing escape routes out of the city.

>Your horn goes off accidentally and remains stuck as you follow a group of Hell's Angels on the freeway.

>You walk to work and find your dress is stuck in the back of your pantyhose.

>You call your answering service and they tell you it's none of your business.

>Your blind date turns out to be your ex.

>Your income tax check bounces.

Bonne journée !


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Tina Vonhof  Identity Verified
Local time: 06:24
Member (2006)
Dutch to English
+ ...
Priceless Aug 18, 2003

That is priceless. Thank you, you made my day!

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Pamela Peralta  Identity Verified
Local time: 07:24
English to Spanish
+ ...
laughs Aug 19, 2003

Thanks Odette, the one of the horn being stuck:) loved it! I read your posting of the four letter word too, keep up the good work


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Sonia Gomes  Identity Verified
Local time: 17:54
Portuguese to English
+ ...
Yes, lovely I am chuckling !! Aug 19, 2003

Thank you Odette that was hilarious, I too loved the horn being stuck......although I have never met any Angels!

I loved the one about the four letter words too, my husband heard me laughing and now he has got a copy for the people at his Office, we loved the Bill Clinton one.

Thank you for making our day a wonderful one.


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Vjollca Martinson  Identity Verified
Local time: 06:24
English to Albanian
+ ...
Thanks, this is funny! Aug 19, 2003

I sure do love the blind date one

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Odette Grille  Identity Verified
Local time: 08:24
English to French
+ ...
You all made my day  ! Aug 20, 2003

Trying to cheer myself up, I am glad I was of use to others...
I'll try to keep it up.

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Monika Coulson  Identity Verified
Local time: 06:24
Member (2001)
English to Albanian
+ ...
Thank you Aug 20, 2003

Thank you Odette,
I am coming back often to read this thread over and over again...

odette Grille-Burgo wrote:

Trying to cheer myself up, I am glad I was of use to others...
I'll try to keep it up.

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Jack Doughty  Identity Verified
United Kingdom
Local time: 13:24
Member (2000)
Russian to English
+ ...
Is it a bad day when your man answers back? Aug 21, 2003

The Guy's Side of the Story

We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

1. Sunday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends give you.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1.Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

1. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like camping.

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Odette Grille  Identity Verified
Local time: 08:24
English to French
+ ...
An honour Aug 21, 2003

[The Guy's Side of the Story
quote]Jack Doughty wrote:

The Guy's Side of the Story<

/I hope I cut the quote correctly... Oh, thank you so much, Jack. A guy's reply is in itself an honour as they seldom bother...And yes, we mind that very very much. I am not sure how we got there from a bad day, but it is fun all the same. I am sending it to my daughters. Their husbands will love me for it...B>

[Edited at 2003-08-21 13:03]

[Edited at 2003-08-21 13:04]

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xxxT_Herrmann  Identity Verified
Local time: 14:24
German to English
+ ...
You guys ROCK :-) Aug 21, 2003

See, men DO answer

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