Off topic: genuine letters written by council tennants
Thread poster: Rebekka Groß
Rebekka Groß  Identity Verified
Local time: 08:00
English to German
Sep 9, 2003

Reading the excuse letters to schools had me in stitches. I remember coming across the following excerpts from genuine letters written by council tennants to get repairs done. Enjoy
1. I wish to complain that my father hurt his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage.

2. The lavatory is blocked, this is caused by the boys next door throwing their balls of the roof.

3. The toilet seat is cracked, where do I stand?

4. I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is running away from the wall.

5. I am still having trouble with smoke in my built in drawers.

6. I request your permission to remove my drawers in my kitchen.

7. Our lavatory is broken in half and is now in three pieces.

8. Can you tell me when repairs are going to be done as my wife is about to become an expectant mother.

9. I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has back fired and burnt my knob off.

10. The toilet seat is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is cleared.

11. The person next door has a large erection in his back garden which is unsightly and dangerous.

12. Will you please send someone to mend our broken path. Yesterday my wife tripped and now she is pregnant.

13. Our kitchen floor is very damp; we have two children and would like a third, so will you please send someone round to do something about it.
14. Would you please repair our toilet, my son pulled the chain and the box fell on his head.

15. Will you please send a man round to look at my spout. I am an old age pensioner and need it straight away.

16. Will you please send a man to look at my water. It is a funny colour and not fit to drink.

17. When I applied for a rebate, you said that you should have to take something off. Now that you have taken it off I have been informed that you should have put something on. So will you please take off what you took off and put on what you should have put on when you took it off.

[Edited at 2003-09-09 13:07]

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Local time: 03:00
Member (2002)
French to English
+ ...

Too funny!!!!! Sep 9, 2003

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Richard Benham  Identity Verified
Local time: 09:00
German to English
+ ...
tennants??? Sep 10, 2003

They're tenants!!!

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Rebekka Groß  Identity Verified
Local time: 08:00
English to German
So I made a typo... Sep 10, 2003

Richard Benham wrote:

They're tenants!!!

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genuine letters written by council tennants

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