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Off topic: Some questions for Sunday
Thread poster: Ritu Bhanot

Ritu Bhanot  Identity Verified
France
Local time: 17:12
Member (2006)
French to Hindi
+ ...
May 27, 2007

Note:
Please take these questions with a pinch of salt. Time to let all the worries fly out of the window...
Do not take them seriously... they made me smile and I wanted to spread the s-mile-s.
Why, Why, Why ?

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

And my FAVORITE......
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you !!!!!


[Edited at 2007-05-27 18:00]


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myrcarromero
Local time: 08:12
English to Spanish
Amazing. They seem to me as Ben Goode books May 27, 2007

All these sentences are really great. Try " The Disgusted Driver's Handbook" by Ben Goode. My jaws still hurt. I go to some restaurants that have the books to keep you busy while you wait for your meal, just to read these amazing books (sometimes the food is really good too...)

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Maria Ondarcuhu
Local time: 13:12
English to Spanish
+ ...
some questions for Sunday May 27, 2007

Otro ¿POR QUE?

¿Por qué las tostadas siempre caen al suelo del lado que tienen el dulce?


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Agnieszka Hayward
Poland
Local time: 17:12
German to Polish
+ ...
Lovely topic! May 27, 2007

Ritu Bhanot wrote:

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?



I don't know WHY, but I know I'll just keep doing that!


My favourite one from a website I once found:

Why is there no cat food with mouse flavour/ meat?


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lingomania
Local time: 02:12
Italian to English
My FUNday question May 27, 2007

Why do ghosts always wear human garb?

G'day

Rob


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Elena Sánchez-Pinto Hodgson  Identity Verified
Spain
Local time: 17:12
Member (2008)
English to Spanish
Two questions May 28, 2007

If nothing sticks to teflon, how do they stick it to the frying-pan?


¿Por qué "todo junto" se escribe separado y "separado" se escribre todo junto?


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NancyLynn
Canada
Local time: 11:12
Member (2002)
French to English
+ ...

MODERATOR
Reminds me of Yogi Berra May 28, 2007

to whom the following is ascribed (rightly or wrongly), but I wondered about it as a child:

Why (in the US) do we drive on the parkway and park in the driveway?

(which begs the next one: why do we drive *on* a parkway but park *in* a driveway?)



Nancy


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William [Bill] Gray  Identity Verified
Norway
Local time: 17:12
Member (2006)
English
+ ...
Thank you... May 29, 2007

Oh Ritu! They were great. Thank you so much. I have even just now copied them to use as an icebreaker with an English teachers' course I am running tomorrow!

I will mention you in person!

Cheers,
Bill


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