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They should have called a translator...(humorous translations)
Thread poster: Silvina Beatriz Codina

Silvina Beatriz Codina  Identity Verified
Argentina
Local time: 15:42
Member (2002)
English to Spanish
+ ...
Apr 16, 2002

Another installment of the \"They Should Have Called a Translator Series\"



Fire Safety in a Russian Hotel



(From the inside of a hotel room in Irkutsk, Russia, on the subject of fire safety.)



In case of a fire in your room:

Arrange to liquidation of fire by being available means.

If to liquidate the center of burning by the forces it is not obviously possible, leave a room and close a door, not locking he on the lock.

If corridors and ladders is strong in smoke, and to leave premises is impossible, remain in your room, by opening of a window.

To avoid a poisoning of smoke, close cracks of an aperature by towels moistened with water and bed fittings.



Instructions on a Pair of Chopsticks



(Reprinted exactly as found on the wrapper of a pair of chopsticks)



Welcome to Chinese Restaurant

please try your Nice Chinese Food With Chopsticks

the traditional and typical of Chinese glonous history.

and cultual.



BAMBOO CHOPSTLCKS

PRODUCT OF CHINA



Tuk under thurnb

and held firmly



Learn how to use your chopsticks

Add second chcostick

hold it as you hold a pencil



Hold tirst chopstick

in originai position

move the second

one up and down

Now you can pick

up anything!



PRODUCTOF

CHINA



Some Bad Japanese-English (always a classic)



Slogan for a grape-flavored candy called Muscat Gummy:



\"Its translucent color so alluring and taste and aroma so gentle and mellow offer admiring feelings of a graceful lady. Enjoy soft and juicy Kasugai Muscat Gummy.\"



••••••••



Instructions on a small fountain:



\"Recommendation: For the first time start using the fountains, please make the wet road first on the stone, so that will be helping water falls smoothly.\"



••••••••



From a Misaki brand bathroom scale, accompanied by a cartoon picture of a dinosaur; the scale is apparently intended for kids:



\"Morning Shower

I like morning shower

Clean my dusty body, and dirty mind.\"



Instructions at a Japanese Porn Site



From a Japanese pornography site, offering viewers a chance to leave if they are under-age:



Adult contents is contained in this site

An entrance under 20 years old is refused rigidly

[click one:]

I leave because it is under 20 years old.

I enter because it is over 20 years old



A Note from the French Police

Contributor found this note on her car, somehow illegally parked in St. Tropez, France:



Attention...

Your car is embarrassing/irregulary parked.

In a few moments it will be taken away and bound up.

The Police Commissary



(From the site http://www.wemadeoutinatreeandthisoldguysatandwatchedus.com, a site devoted to English language horrors)


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RHELLER
United States
Local time: 12:42
French to English
+ ...
agency using kudoZ help to do translation Apr 16, 2002

one specific agency has posted multiple questions on \"spring coil apparatus\".



My reply: they should have called a translator!
[addsig]


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Alison Schwitzgebel
Germany
Local time: 20:42
Member (2002)
German to English
+ ...
But even calling a translator doesn't always help.... Apr 16, 2002

I just got back from vacation in Austria, where we visited the Hundertwasser Spa in Blumau. In line with the general ambience of the place, they had planted a \"Celtic Tree Circle\", with signs beside the trees to tell you what your tree is depending on your birthday and with an outline of your general personality traits....



Now most of us know that running the spell-checker alone isn\'t always enough - you gotta eyeball the translation too, right? Wrong. We were much amused to find \"Pappelbaum\" translated as \"Popular Tree\" (shoulda been \"poplar\").....



Never assume someone else is going to proof your work for you before it goes to print (or in this case gets inscribed in metal for all eternity....)



Alison


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Lydia Molea  Identity Verified
Germany
Local time: 20:42
English to German
+ ...
Another translation jokes site Apr 16, 2002

http://www.fortunecity.com/business/moo/1132/Jokes.html



This site has some really funny stuff on it! Check it out



Lydia


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Jack Doughty  Identity Verified
United Kingdom
Local time: 19:42
Member (2000)
Russian to English
+ ...
Found in a French hotel Apr 16, 2002

\"There is a French widow in every bedroom, affording delightful prospects.\"

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Steffen Pollex  Identity Verified
Local time: 20:42
English to German
+ ...
Well,... Apr 16, 2002

if the widow is not too old...))



On 2002-04-16 15:50, jdoughty wrote:

\"There is a French widow in every bedroom, affording delightful prospects.\"

[/quote]


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Evi Wollinger  Identity Verified
Germany
Local time: 20:42
German to English
+ ...
Haven't laughed like that for a long time!! Thank you! Apr 17, 2002

Quote:


On 2002-04-16 14:45, lmolea wrote:

http://www.fortunecity.com/business/moo/1132/Jokes.html



This site has some really funny stuff on it! Check it out



Lydia



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artyan
United States
Local time: 11:42
English to Russian
+ ...
Pollution (environmental vs. physiological) Apr 17, 2002


This happened at a conference. The speaker was going through the presentation too fast, and the interpreter had real problems trying to catch up:



Speaker:

\"All issues related to pollution should be solved on the panel level.\"



Interpreter (in Russian):

\"Vse voprosy, kasayuschiesya pollyutsii, sleduyet reshat\' na panel\'nom urovne,\"



which means, verbatim:



\"All issues related to pollution should be solved on the level of prostitutes.\"



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They should have called a translator...(humorous translations)

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