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to be left behind the stern

English translation: He looked ahead at the vast expanse of water which flashed by in a hiss of foam

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12:17 Jun 18, 2005
English to English translations [PRO]
Art/Literary - Poetry & Literature / children's literature
English term or phrase: to be left behind the stern
He was looking ahead observing the vast plain of water flashing by with hissing foam to be left behind the stern.

Dear native English speakers!
Please advise if the phrase souds OK to you or if I should change it somehow.
I'm also not really sure about 'water flashing by with hissing foam'. Is the idea clear here? Can 'flashing' be really used when talking about water? Please advise!

The context:
The character is sailing a boat that skims over the water very quickly.
Andrew Vdovin
Local time: 18:45
English translation:He looked ahead at the vast expanse of water which flashed by in a hiss of foam
Explanation:
He looked ahead at the vast expanse of water which flashed by in a hiss of foam
Selected response from:

Balasubramaniam L.
India
Local time: 17:15
Grading comment
Thank you for your help! Thanks everybody!!!
4 KudoZ points were awarded for this answer

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Summary of answers provided
5 +1As he looked over the vastness of the water ahead ,zaphod
5...with foam hissing (out) behind the stern.KNielsen
4 +1he looked ahead at the vast expanse of water which was flashing by with hissing foamRefugio
3 +1He looked ahead at the vast expanse of water which flashed by in a hiss of foam
Balasubramaniam L.
4( ... with the sound of hissing foam) trailing the stern
Michael Powers (PhD)


Discussion entries: 4





  

Answers


2 mins   confidence: Answerer confidence 4/5Answerer confidence 4/5
( ... with the sound of hissing foam) trailing the stern


Explanation:
Mike :)

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Note added at 4 mins (2005-06-18 12:21:47 GMT)
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I don\'t the construction you gave us in this linguistic environment because you start in the past (\"He was looking ahead ...\"), and then this contruction, \"to VERB remainder\" is usually used for something in the future, making it imcompatible. However, if you eliminate that and connect it with the gerund (VERB ing), then you eliminate this incongruency.



Michael Powers (PhD)
United States
Local time: 07:45
Native speaker of: Native in EnglishEnglish
PRO pts in category: 120
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1 hr   confidence: Answerer confidence 4/5Answerer confidence 4/5 peer agreement (net): +1
he looked ahead at the vast expanse of water which was flashing by with hissing foam


Explanation:
I think the part about "to be left behind the stern" is redundant and maybe not necessary at all. If the water flashes by, where else is it going to go?

Refugio
Local time: 04:45
Specializes in field
Native speaker of: Native in EnglishEnglish
PRO pts in category: 120

Peer comments on this answer (and responses from the answerer)
agree  Balasubramaniam L.: This is nice. I have put up a slight variation of this. I couldn't avoid "vast exapnse of water", there seems to be no alternative to it. Hope you will forgive me.
49 mins
  -> Thanks. Actually, David had put up "vast expanse" before me, but it was what I had in mind before reading his comment.
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2 hrs   confidence: Answerer confidence 3/5Answerer confidence 3/5 peer agreement (net): +1
He looked ahead at the vast expanse of water which flashed by in a hiss of foam


Explanation:
He looked ahead at the vast expanse of water which flashed by in a hiss of foam

Balasubramaniam L.
India
Local time: 17:15
Native speaker of: Native in HindiHindi
PRO pts in category: 32
Grading comment
Thank you for your help! Thanks everybody!!!

Peer comments on this answer (and responses from the answerer)
agree  Refugio: I like yours better than mine. ;~}
1 min
  -> Thanks Ruth, you are very kind.
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10 hrs   confidence: Answerer confidence 5/5 peer agreement (net): +1
As he looked over the vastness of the water ahead ,


Explanation:
the hissing foam flashed by to be left astern..
Candidate for the "dark and stormy night" contest.


zaphod
Local time: 13:45
Native speaker of: Native in EnglishEnglish, Native in FrenchFrench
PRO pts in category: 8

Peer comments on this answer (and responses from the answerer)
agree  Vicky Papaprodromou
58 mins
  -> Thanks
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1 day17 hrs   confidence: Answerer confidence 5/5
...with foam hissing (out) behind the stern.


Explanation:
And I would say, cut "looking ahead;" as David says, it doesn't quite fit with "flashing by." And maybe cut "plain," too; how about "He was looking at the vast water flashing by with foam hissing (out) behind the stern"? Technically, you ought to have a word in between "vast" and "water" but this is literature, not an essay, and expressing it more quickly allows the image to form in the reader's mind.

KNielsen
Japan
Local time: 20:45
Works in field
Native speaker of: Native in EnglishEnglish
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