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confusing grammatical construction

German translation: Yes, very confusing (and missing something)

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19:06 Dec 5, 2004
English to German translations [PRO]
Law/Patents - Law: Contract(s) / lease contract
English term or phrase: confusing grammatical construction
Another tricky question I need help with! Again the lease contract(the 'centre' is a mall). The writer obviously forgot one closing bracket -where do I put it??- and maybe other punctuation. It would help me greatly if you could help me pare down this sentence to more manageable units.

"Realty taxes or other amounts for lands and buildings forming part of the centre or site not in day to day use for the centre as parking areas, landscaped areas or built upon areas ***(except in cases where the denominator of the fraction representing the tenant's share of proprtionate share of the centre's real estate taxes and other amounts ***include areas of premises leased to major Tenants in respect of any building or part occupied by a major tenant including a department store and land forming part thereof."
Mein mutiger Versuch:
Immobiliensteuern und andere Abgaben für zum Zentrum oder dem Gelände gehörende Grundstücke oder Gebäude, die nicht laufend als Parkplatz für das Zentrum oder Gelände, landschaftlich gestaltete Flächen oder bebaute Gemeinschaftsnutzflächen benutzt werden ***(mit Ausnahme von Fällen, bei denen der Nenner des Bruches dem Anteil des Pächters an der auf den Grundbesitz anteilsmäßig entspricht) und andere fällige Beträge schließen ***solche für Räumlichkeitsflächen mit ein, die – im Hinblick auf Gebäude oder Gebäudeteile – an größere Pächter verpachtet sind, einschließlich eines Kaufhauses und Grundstücken, die Teil eines solchen sind.

Danke!
Johanna Timm, PhD
Canada
Local time: 13:59
German translation:Yes, very confusing (and missing something)
Explanation:
I see what you are doing here and it is about the only thing that makes sense, though I think that the author completely forgot to finish the sentence (...got carried away and then decided to put it out of its misery by placing a period).

Like I already said, I don't know where you got 'entspricht' from, except that it is about the only thing that makes sense.

Hmmm... 'Realty taxes and other amounts include areas leased to major tenants.' What does this say to me? Not much. The question is "Who has to pay the taxes?" ;-)

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Note added at 1 hr 17 mins (2004-12-05 20:23:15 GMT)
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Your client might appreciate it if you tactly recommend having the contract reviewed by an attorney. These are the type of clauses that cause problems in the future - they do not have to be written so complicated. One could argue just as strongly that the closing bracket should come after \'thereof\'. If I were negotiating the contract, I would draw attention to these confusing paragraphs and try to work a more understandable version into the contract (or at least demand an explanation).
If you don\'t feel comfortable in putting it that bluntly, you could always just tell your client that this particular clause is(extremely) ambiguous and \"may\" be missing a verb. That should be enough for them take a closer look at them.
//AFTER YOU NOTE: That would explain the missing verb part (I can totally understand your urge). ;-)
Selected response from:

Derek Gill Franßen
Germany
Local time: 22:59
Grading comment
Danke noch einmal Gisela f. die Mühe, die du dir gemacht hast, diesen Satz zu schlachten! Ich habe deine Version verwendet, aber ebenfalls, wie Derek mir geraten hat, mit einer Anmerkung versehen. Der Vertrag ist abgeschickt--- und heute erwarte ich drei weitere dieses Kalibers....
4 KudoZ points were awarded for this answer

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Summary of answers provided
3Help with missing bracket
Gisela Greenlee
1Yes, very confusing (and missing something)
Derek Gill Franßen


Discussion entries: 2





  

Answers


27 mins   confidence: Answerer confidence 1/5Answerer confidence 1/5
Yes, very confusing (and missing something)


Explanation:
I see what you are doing here and it is about the only thing that makes sense, though I think that the author completely forgot to finish the sentence (...got carried away and then decided to put it out of its misery by placing a period).

Like I already said, I don't know where you got 'entspricht' from, except that it is about the only thing that makes sense.

Hmmm... 'Realty taxes and other amounts include areas leased to major tenants.' What does this say to me? Not much. The question is "Who has to pay the taxes?" ;-)

--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 1 hr 17 mins (2004-12-05 20:23:15 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------

Your client might appreciate it if you tactly recommend having the contract reviewed by an attorney. These are the type of clauses that cause problems in the future - they do not have to be written so complicated. One could argue just as strongly that the closing bracket should come after \'thereof\'. If I were negotiating the contract, I would draw attention to these confusing paragraphs and try to work a more understandable version into the contract (or at least demand an explanation).
If you don\'t feel comfortable in putting it that bluntly, you could always just tell your client that this particular clause is(extremely) ambiguous and \"may\" be missing a verb. That should be enough for them take a closer look at them.
//AFTER YOU NOTE: That would explain the missing verb part (I can totally understand your urge). ;-)

Derek Gill Franßen
Germany
Local time: 22:59
Specializes in field
Native speaker of: English
PRO pts in category: 242
Grading comment
Danke noch einmal Gisela f. die Mühe, die du dir gemacht hast, diesen Satz zu schlachten! Ich habe deine Version verwendet, aber ebenfalls, wie Derek mir geraten hat, mit einer Anmerkung versehen. Der Vertrag ist abgeschickt--- und heute erwarte ich drei weitere dieses Kalibers....
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7 hrs   confidence: Answerer confidence 3/5Answerer confidence 3/5
Help with missing bracket


Explanation:
Hi Johanna,
I think the bracket belongs here:

***(except in cases where the denominator of the fraction representing the tenant's share of proprtionate share of the centre's real estate taxes and other amounts)

because at the beginning of the sentence the author refers to real estate taxes and other amounts.
So, I have repasted the sentence below without the bracketed part and you will see that it is starting to make a bit more sense.
"Realty taxes or other amounts for lands and buildings forming part of the centre or site not in day to day use for the centre as parking areas, landscaped areas or built upon areas include areas of premises leased to major Tenants in respect of any building or part occupied by a major tenant including a department store and land forming part thereof."

It's still an awful sentence, but I think it's easier to understand now.


Gisela Greenlee
Local time: 15:59
Native speaker of: German
PRO pts in category: 4
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