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|German to English translations [Non-PRO]|
|German term or phrase: to follow|
|I would appreciate some help with the fine tuning of the following sentence, context marketing; I rarely translate Marketing, and if,then only into German; this is new territory for me and I am really nervous! I will probably post a few other sentences...many thanks in advance.Here goes:|
Unser Fokus liegt im Angebot einer Infrastruktur, die es unseren Klienten ermöglicht, sich beim Eintritt in den neuen Markt voll auf ihr Kerngeschäft zu konzentrieren, ohne eine kostspielige Verwaltung aufbauen zu müssen. Wir liefern den Standort für die Aktivitäten unserer Klienten und bieten Dienstleistungen nach Mass.
Our primary focus is to offer an infrastructure that will enable our clients to concentrate fully on their core business when entering the new market - without having to worry about setting up an expensive administrative apparatus. We can provide you with a fully functional business site - and customized services.
|English translation:Sounds good to me!|
Don't know what you're so worried about (-:
This is just another version for comparison - there is really nothing wrong with yours!
Our main aim is to provide an infrastructure that will enable our customers to focus entirely on their core business when going into a new market, without having to set up expensive administration systems. We can provide our customers with a fully functional business site and tailor our services to meet their requirements.
Selected response from:
Local time: 16:06
|Well,- I would like to thank EVERYBODY so very much for their kind words and support. I picked a little a bit from all the answers, andunfortunately can only award points to one. The winner is Mary! Gratefully,|
4 KudoZ points were awarded for this answer
12 mins confidence: peer agreement (net): +1 14 mins confidence: 14 mins confidence: peer agreement (net): +1
Do you have the freedom to rephrase?
If you wanted to translate bad marketing copy into a better one, you would start every sentence addressing the customer or the customer's needs. For example:
Entering a new market you want to focus on your core business. We therefore focus on .....
just a suggestion, I don't know how much freedom you have for your translation. (Marketing mistakes 1 - 10 are based on talking about one's own business, not the customer and his business.)
|Login to enter a peer comment (or grade)|15 mins confidence:
Your rendition is really good, but let's look at the last sentence.
We provide not only the site where our clients can conduct their activities, but also customized services.
|Login to enter a peer comment (or grade)|16 mins confidence:
Our primary focus....
I don't think you need to worry at all.
Good translation, as far as I'm concerned, except for -maybe- '...business site', which might cause some confusing.
'We provide the location/site for the activities of our customers...(...the site our customers need for the development of their activities...) and offer ...' is maybe quite literally translated, but closer to the source text.
|Login to enter a peer comment (or grade)|39 mins confidence:
I think your rendition is excellent.
The only thing I might think of changing would be to leave out "having to worry about" so "...will enable our clients to concentrate fully on their core business when entering the new market - without setting up an expensive administative apparatus."
Also, you might want to consider "entering a new market" (instead of the, unless only one specific market is involved)
But these are very fine points that could just be "Geschmackssache" - your translation is absolutely fine as is.
Good luck with the rest of your text!
Local time: 11:06
Native speaker of: English
PRO pts in pair: 924
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