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ver poema

English translation: yet another version ...

GLOSSARY ENTRY (DERIVED FROM QUESTION BELOW)
Spanish term or phrase:ver poema
English translation:yet another version ...
Entered by: Rachel Fell

20:20 Feb 19, 2006
Spanish to English translations [PRO]
Art/Literary - Other
Spanish term or phrase: ver poema
Sigo con el mismo poema que como verán me está costando mucho. Por favor miren la estrofa entre "*" (por las culpas...). Me encantaría que me compartieran sus versiones. Yo les copio la mía, al final, para que opinen. (No la lean antes de intentar una propia por favor).
Gracias.

A veces, el sueño de un arpa
o el de un órgano,
o el de una pianola o de un violín,
y a veces también el sueño de una guitarra
o el de un acordeón o una quena
traen otras plegarias

y el silencio guarda los valores mancillados
de uno y otro lado de los ruegos.

A veces son coros, o apenas un suspiro.

*Por las culpas ajenas , asumidas,
intentan un perdón por lo no hecho
los que llegaron y llegan,
emigrados. *

Sólo son los que escuchan el silencio
como un rezo bendito de esta tierra
los que extienden sus manos
y, dando gracias,
elevan, enraizados, la esperanza,

(sigue...)


Mi versión:
The emigrants,
both arrived and arriving,
attempt forgiveness for the not done
for the adopted faults of others.
Cecilia Aguila
Local time: 04:56
yet another...
Explanation:
For the wrongs of others, which they bear,
They seek forgiveness for what they have not done,
Those who have come and those who come still,
The migrants.

or "for sins/wrongs not their own".

Sorry if I'm copying any others' phrasings - just adding a bit after reading a few
Selected response from:

Rachel Fell
United Kingdom
Local time: 08:56
Grading comment
Thank you all. I really enjoyed all your translations and I really had a hard time making up my mind. THank you all.
4 KudoZ points were awarded for this answer



Summary of answers provided
4 +3Versión
uxia90
5undone
Valeria Verholen (X)
4otra version
Coral Getino
4what they didn't do
Refugio
4seek forgiveness for sins not their own
Chiquipaisa
4how about this ...?
Jennifer Levey
3yet another...
Rachel Fell


Discussion entries: 2





  

Answers


8 mins   confidence: Answerer confidence 5/5
undone


Explanation:
instead of not done


Valeria Verholen (X)
Local time: 01:56
Native speaker of: Native in SpanishSpanish
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14 mins   confidence: Answerer confidence 4/5Answerer confidence 4/5 peer agreement (net): +3
Versión


Explanation:
Esta es mi versión:

For others' assumed faults, ["adopted" is better for attitude, rather than for responsibilities]
they seek for forgiveness for what's not done, ["attempt"+to+vb, creo]
those who arrived and still arrive,
emigrants.


uxia90
Local time: 09:56
Native speaker of: Native in SpanishSpanish, Native in GalicianGalician
PRO pts in category: 4

Peer comments on this answer (and responses from the answerer)
agree  claudia16 (X): what's not their doing..
5 mins
  -> Yep. Good one. Thanks.
agree  Rachel Fell: + they seek forgiveness (not for it)
2 hrs
  -> Yes, thanks. I prefer that one too.
agree  tangotrans
16 hrs
  -> Thanks
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15 mins   confidence: Answerer confidence 4/5Answerer confidence 4/5
otra version


Explanation:
Una version:

Those who arrived and still arrive,
the emigrants,
attempt redemption
for alien, accepted faults,
for what they did not do / they are not responsible for.

Coral Getino
United States
Specializes in field
Native speaker of: Native in SpanishSpanish
PRO pts in category: 12
Login to enter a peer comment (or grade)

15 mins   confidence: Answerer confidence 4/5Answerer confidence 4/5
what they didn't do


Explanation:
The emigrees,
both those who came and those who come,
seek pardon for what they did not do,
embracing the guilt of others.


Refugio
Local time: 00:56
Native speaker of: Native in EnglishEnglish
PRO pts in category: 78
Login to enter a peer comment (or grade)

26 mins   confidence: Answerer confidence 4/5Answerer confidence 4/5
seek forgiveness for sins not their own


Explanation:
I think culpas here can be interpreted as sins... here is my version

Emigrants
who have arrived and continue to arrive
seek forgiveness for sins not their own, yet assumed

I think phrased this way you can avoid trying to fit in "lo no hecho" if you say something like sins not their own....


Chiquipaisa
Native speaker of: Native in EnglishEnglish, Native in SpanishSpanish
PRO pts in category: 12
Login to enter a peer comment (or grade)

1 hr   confidence: Answerer confidence 4/5Answerer confidence 4/5
how about this ...?


Explanation:
For others' sins, assumed,
pardon they seek for the never-done
they, the emigrants,
coming and yet to come.

Jennifer Levey
Chile
Local time: 03:56
Native speaker of: Native in EnglishEnglish
PRO pts in category: 67
Login to enter a peer comment (or grade)

3 hrs   confidence: Answerer confidence 3/5Answerer confidence 3/5
yet another...


Explanation:
For the wrongs of others, which they bear,
They seek forgiveness for what they have not done,
Those who have come and those who come still,
The migrants.

or "for sins/wrongs not their own".

Sorry if I'm copying any others' phrasings - just adding a bit after reading a few

Rachel Fell
United Kingdom
Local time: 08:56
Specializes in field
Native speaker of: Native in EnglishEnglish
PRO pts in category: 20
Grading comment
Thank you all. I really enjoyed all your translations and I really had a hard time making up my mind. THank you all.
Login to enter a peer comment (or grade)



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