《飞鸟集》选译
Thread poster: luttyzhu

luttyzhu
Hong Kong
Local time: 01:01
English to Chinese
+ ...
Aug 17, 2014

The fish in the water is silent.
The animal on the earth is noisy.
The bird in the air is singing.
But man has in him the silence of the sea, the noise of the earth, and the music of the air.
我的译文:
鱼闲兽鸣鸟欢唱
天海云吟在我心

Stray birds of summer come to my window to sing and fly away.
And yellow leaves of autumn, which have no songs, flutter and fall there with a sigh.
我的译文:
迷途鸟,至我窗,来又走,夏歌唱
谁无辞,唯叹息?飘零落,秋叶黄


Troupe of little vagrants of the world, leave your footprints in my words.
小而伴,漂于世,留尔踪,于吾字


The sands in your way beg for your song and your movement, dancing water.
Will you carry the burden of their lameness?
轻沙无足,唯求流水,以君歌舞,携我远走


 

J.H. Wang
China
Local time: 01:01
Member (2007)
English to Chinese
+ ...
我仿佛看到姚先生回来了 Aug 17, 2014

luttyzhu wrote:

The fish in the water is silent.
The animal on the earth is noisy.
The bird in the air is singing.
But man has in him the silence of the sea, the noise of the earth, and the music of the air.
我的译文:
鱼闲兽鸣鸟欢唱
天海云吟在我心

Stray birds of summer come to my window to sing and fly away.
And yellow leaves of autumn, which have no songs, flutter and fall there with a sigh.
我的译文:
迷途鸟,至我窗,来又走,夏歌唱
谁无辞,唯叹息?飘零落,秋叶黄


Troupe of little vagrants of the world, leave your footprints in my words.
小而伴,漂于世,留尔踪,于吾字


The sands in your way beg for your song and your movement, dancing water.
Will you carry the burden of their lameness?
轻沙无足,唯求流水,以君歌舞,携我远走


你的翻译风格与姚登南先生极其相似。


 

David Lin  Identity Verified
United Kingdom
Local time: 18:01
Member (2013)
English to Chinese
+ ...

Moderator of this forum
热烈欢迎你加入本论坛! Aug 17, 2014

luttyzhu wrote:

The fish in the water is silent.
The animal on the earth is noisy.
The bird in the air is singing.
But man has in him the silence of the sea, the noise of the earth, and the music of the air.
我的译文:
鱼闲兽鸣鸟欢唱
天海云吟在我心

Stray birds of summer come to my window to sing and fly away.
And yellow leaves of autumn, which have no songs, flutter and fall there with a sigh.
我的译文:
迷途鸟,至我窗,来又走,夏歌唱
谁无辞,唯叹息?飘零落,秋叶黄


Troupe of little vagrants of the world, leave your footprints in my words.
小而伴,漂于世,留尔踪,于吾字


The sands in your way beg for your song and your movement, dancing water.
Will you carry the burden of their lameness?
轻沙无足,唯求流水,以君歌舞,携我远走


一大早起来(我这边是伦敦时间)看到清新悦目的中英文诗句,马上如暖流入心,精神为之一振。

欢迎你 Luttyzhu,以后多来这里发表你的诗词文艺翻译心得。

David


 

J.H. Wang
China
Local time: 01:01
Member (2007)
English to Chinese
+ ...
一点翻译探讨 Aug 19, 2014

luttyzhu wrote:

The fish in the water is silent.
The animal on the earth is noisy.
The bird in the air is singing.
But man has in him the silence of the sea, the noise of the earth, and the music of the air.
我的译文:
鱼闲兽鸣鸟欢唱
天海云吟在我心



luttyzhu 的译文文字精妙,不过,由于过于简练,感觉似乎不够尽意,故试完整翻译如下:


海水里的鱼是沉默的。
陆地上的兽是喧闹的。
空中的鸟是歌唱的。
但是,人却兼有大海的沉默、陆地的喧闹和空中的音乐。


欢迎批评指正!

[Edited at 2014-08-19 14:51 GMT]

[Edited at 2014-08-20 11:17 GMT]


 

luttyzhu
Hong Kong
Local time: 01:01
English to Chinese
+ ...
TOPIC STARTER
谢谢支持~~ Aug 20, 2014

我本人很喜欢汉语的诗歌,但是英语的读的不多,很少有接触。
假如各位有喜欢的英文诗歌,希望能够提供给我试一试,谢谢~~


 


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