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Fun: UFO/Alien translations
Thread poster: Halil Ibrahim Tutuncuoglu "Бёcäטsع Լîfe's cômplicåtعd eñøugh"

Halil Ibrahim Tutuncuoglu "Бёcäטsع Լîfe's cômplicåtعd eñøugh"
Turkey
Local time: 16:59
Turkish to English
+ ...
Oct 5, 2010

The United Nations is set to appoint Mazlan Othman as space ambassador for extraterrestrial contact affairs. THE PROBLEM IS WHO WILL MAKE THE TRANSLATIONS?

How do you think the rates/hour and means of payment should be?


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Mykhailo Voloshko  Identity Verified
Ukraine
Local time: 16:59
Member (2008)
English to Russian
+ ...
light year Oct 5, 2010

Why not ... per light year? (;

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Jack Doughty  Identity Verified
United Kingdom
Local time: 14:59
Member (2000)
Russian to English
+ ...
I think they'll have to use alien translators Oct 5, 2010

The aliens will have to be much more advanced than we are to have got here over so many light years (a light year, by the way, is a measure of distance, not time - quite a considerable distance, since light travels at 186,000 miles per second), and their own intelligence and that of their computers, robots, androids etc. will be of a vastly higher order than ours.

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Tomás Cano Binder, BA, CT  Identity Verified
Spain
Local time: 15:59
Member (2005)
English to Spanish
+ ...
What worries me most is... Oct 6, 2010

...what is the actual rate gap between human translators and alien translators? If they are paid more I am OK with that, since that will in due time raise our rates. But... are they paid less than humans? That will probably lead human agencies to hire them for human translation at a ridiculous cost, despite the poor quality.

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Victor Dewsbery  Identity Verified
Germany
Local time: 15:59
What about ... Oct 6, 2010

... the travelling expenses?



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David Wright  Identity Verified
Austria
Local time: 15:59
German to English
+ ...
Will be worse Oct 6, 2010

just imagine - telecom call centres on Betelgeuse!

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Victor Dewsbery  Identity Verified
Germany
Local time: 15:59
Withdrawing money from a bank account Oct 6, 2010

"Sorry, Sir, we can't give you any cash from that account. The planet was blown up last week."

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Simone Linke  Identity Verified
Germany
Local time: 15:59
Member (2009)
English to German
+ ...
No need.. Oct 6, 2010

No need for translations.. they'll bring some babelfish with them. Don't you know anything about aliens?!

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Tomás Cano Binder, BA, CT  Identity Verified
Spain
Local time: 15:59
Member (2005)
English to Spanish
+ ...
Are you suggesting... Oct 6, 2010

Simone Linke wrote:
No need for translations.. they'll bring some babelfish with them. Don't you know anything about aliens?!

...they will laugh aloud about human automatic translation systems? How they dare! They are so good!


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Victor Dewsbery  Identity Verified
Germany
Local time: 15:59
But what about tax law? Oct 6, 2010

Simone Linke wrote:
No need for translations.. they'll bring some babelfish with them. Don't you know anything about aliens?!


Even human tax consultants often don't understand tax law, let alone tax law in different languages, in different countries or on different planets. What chance has Babelfish got?
Or will tax law be simplified to the point of "pay up or get blown up"?

As Douglas Adams suggested, Babelfish did not bring peace, it in fact caused more bloodshed than ever before.


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Alison Sabedoria  Identity Verified
France
Member (2009)
French to English
+ ...
Fish farming Oct 6, 2010

I agree with Simone, so astute translators might want to diversify into babelfish farming pretty soon.

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Halil Ibrahim Tutuncuoglu "Бёcäטsع Լîfe's cômplicåtعd eñøugh"
Turkey
Local time: 16:59
Turkish to English
+ ...
TOPIC STARTER
no travelling expenses Oct 6, 2010

Victor Dewsbery wrote:

... the travelling expenses?



they use free and environmentally friendly solar energy


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Alison Sabedoria  Identity Verified
France
Member (2009)
French to English
+ ...
@ Victor Oct 6, 2010

The way things are going, we won't need to wait for aliens before the "pay up or get blown up" system becomes the norm here, though I can't really see myself adding that to the bottom of my bills.

And, as you suggest, the babelfish won't really help. At least when two people don't understand each other, there's room for giving the other the benefit of the doubt, or for an interpreter to "tweak" the level of insult.


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Victor Dewsbery  Identity Verified
Germany
Local time: 15:59
My time ain't free Oct 6, 2010

İbrahim Tutuncuoglu wrote:
Victor Dewsbery wrote:
... the travelling expenses?

they use free and environmentally friendly solar energy


But they've still gotta pay for my time.
After all, if I'm out of the loop for my regular clients for a light year or two, someone's gotta compensate me.

$$$$$ €€€€€


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Jack Doughty  Identity Verified
United Kingdom
Local time: 14:59
Member (2000)
Russian to English
+ ...
The tax authorities will find them Oct 6, 2010

Rimmer, one of the crew of "Red Dwarf" (UK TV series), was landed with a tax bill from the Outland Revenue (as opposed to the Inland Revenue) for two million pounds because the spaceship had been in a state of suspended animation for hundreds of years. Doubtless the US External Revenue Service and the Betelgeuse tax authorities would do the same.

[Edited at 2010-10-06 09:09 GMT]


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