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Feedback wanted about my (brand new) site
Thread poster: Florence Lesur

Florence Lesur  Identity Verified
France
Local time: 09:21
English to French
+ ...
Feb 11, 2010

Hey all,

After several years working as a translator, I eventually got down to creating my own Website.
As my profile will say, I work from English to French and Russian to French, and designed my site in those 3 languages.

I am quite fluent in English, but feel uncomfortable writing in Russian (call me the perfectionist), so a friend of mine translated the page into Russian (thanks Albena!).

My intent with this message is two-fold:

- Would some native English and Russian speakers be so kind as to check the site for mistakes, info that should be there, odd stuff and things that no one would say in [put your native language here]? (Send your comments directly to me, unless you think it might spark some interesting debate.)

- What do you think about translators who have a good passive knowledge of their source language, but don't master them enough on the active side?

Thanks a lot in advance,

Florence
http://www.florence-lesur-traduction.com


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Noni Gilbert
Spain
Local time: 09:21
Spanish to English
+ ...
Typo in English Feb 11, 2010

Rigour!

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Sabine Akabayov, PhD
Israel
Local time: 10:21
Member (2011)
English to German
+ ...
passive knowledge Feb 11, 2010

I guess it would depend on the subject of the text if passive knowledge is enough to deliver a (very) good translation. Translating technical texts would be fine, but other texts like marketing, literature etc. require the knowledge of very small nuances in the language which can only be recognized when actively using that language (IMHO).
Additionally, the translator should be aware, that his/her knowledge is only passive. I took once a course in translating from my native language to English (it was an online course and there was no option for the reverse direction). The teacher, a native English speaker, wrote once in a while a sentence in German. These were really bad and he couldn't even write a proper greeting. I really lost all my respect for this teacher and it would have been better for him not to try to write anything in German at all. This also showed in checking our exercises. I disagreed a few times when it came to understanding/translating spoken language in a novel, but technical translations were fine.


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Sebastian Abbo
Local time: 09:21
French to English
Looks good Feb 11, 2010

It seems very simple and clear. The only comment that I have is that in the English section you could put "My aim" instead of "My purpose", which sounds a bit passive.

Regards, Sebastian abbo


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Lany Chabot-Laroche  Identity Verified
Canada
Local time: 03:21
Member (2009)
English to French
Typos even. Feb 11, 2010

Also, where are the resumes, the samples, the client lists? In short, anything to prove your worth?

Also, I would add a base rate to give potential clients an idea where you stand, some people only look for translators in a certain price range and won't bother to ask you if they don't see it.


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Mark Thompson  Identity Verified
Brazil
Local time: 06:21
Member
Portuguese to English
Nice Feb 11, 2010

Congratulations, I found it easy on the eye, a pleasure to read.

I might have put "My mission" instead of my purpose, which, as a previous poster commented, looks a bit pedestrian IMO.

Here's wishing you lots of hits!


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Hildegard Klein-Bodenheimer  Identity Verified
Germany
Local time: 09:21
English to German
+ ...
My working fields Feb 11, 2010

I have a form suggestion: You started the green headlines in French with "mon/mes" and you did the same for the English website: My purpose, my assets, my Cat tools. But then you left it out for the third headline. I feel you should do that also for the English headline "working fields".

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Lina Episheva  Identity Verified
Member (2008)
English to Georgian
+ ...
Feedback Feb 11, 2010

I like the English version of your site but the Russian one is not good. It has many mistakes - spelling, grammar, stylistic and punctuation. I think you should ask a native speaker to correct it...:)

Regards,
Lina


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Kristina Radziulyte  Identity Verified
Lithuania
Local time: 10:21
Member (2006)
English to Lithuanian
+ ...

Moderator of this forum
Russian version Feb 11, 2010

Congratulations on your website! I liked the design and the content. However, the Russian version looks odd. For ex., this sentence:
Проверитесь мой календарь занятости на мою страницу ProZ.com.

My Russian is far from good, but the sentence looks like a machine translation. I think you should ask somebody to proofread the Russian text.


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Alina Barrow
France
Local time: 09:21
Member (2006)
English to Russian
+ ...
Russian Feb 11, 2010

Проверьте календарь занятости на моей личной странице ProZ.com

The rest is fine.


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PRAKAASH  Identity Verified
India
Local time: 13:51
Member (2007)
English to Hindi
+ ...
Fields section Feb 11, 2010

I feel that you have worked in numerous fields which you should include here. Another suggestion is design of the site, if it could be a little bit more dynamic? It could be of help to you as it would have been more attractive and catchy to eyes.
Anyway thanks to you, I am also planning to have mine later this year. However, my proz profile says all about work, that is required for clients/outsourcers. Moreover, I keep on updating my proz calendar and twitter updates too.
Best of luck to you!

: PRAKAASH


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Valery Kaminski  Identity Verified
Belarus
Local time: 11:21
Member (2006)
English to Russian
+ ...
Needs proof in Russian Feb 11, 2010

Alina Barrow wrote:


Проверьте календарь занятости на моей личной странице ProZ.com

The rest is fine.


No, the rest is not fine. Apart from typos (агенТствам, темЫ) and some missing commas, which are easy to correct, it needs better phrasing in some places.

Sorry for being straightforward but the way it looks now it will not attract any clients, quite the opposite ;(


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Alistair Gainey  Identity Verified
United Kingdom
Local time: 08:21
Member (2009)
Russian to English
My thoughts on this issue Feb 11, 2010

I like what you've done with the layout. It would be nice not to have to scroll down, but maybe that's not possible. I would, however, suggest that for a translator a passion for translation is not so much an asset as a prerequisite.

[Edited at 2010-02-12 06:49 GMT]


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Marina Aleyeva  Identity Verified
Ukraine
Local time: 10:21
English to Russian
+ ...
The Russian is awkward Feb 12, 2010

Congrats on your new website! However, it is too obvious that the Russian is a translation by a non-native speaker. Some words just don't get together well and some wordings look like a word for word translation. The Russian does not sell.

[Edited at 2010-02-12 01:00 GMT]


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Florence Lesur  Identity Verified
France
Local time: 09:21
English to French
+ ...
TOPIC STARTER
Thanks! Feb 12, 2010

Looks like I was well inspired to turn to other translators for feedback. Thanks a lot.

As far as the English page is concerned, I will correct the small typos here and there.

Hildegard, thanks for spotting the missing "My" ahead of the Working Fields. Should have paid more attention.
As for the "Purpose" that ought to an Aim or a Mission, that's a nuance I didn't know, but will definitely commit to memory (and to the Web page).
I also received a couple of suggestions for stylistic improvements that are definitely food for thought. One of them I would like to ask for general opinion:

Does "languages and words in general, and translation in particular" feel much like a French structure, or awkward to an English native ear/eye? Or do you know any idea how to put it more fluently?

As for the Russian page, I'll write a separate post, as there was and is obviously much to be said.

Thank you.

Florence


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