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is this sentence ok ? (2)

English translation: Paraphrase attempt

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10:27 Mar 4, 2004
English to English translations [PRO]
Tech/Engineering / range finder
English term or phrase: is this sentence ok ? (2)
For example, in case of producing interference to the range finder, which operates at the distance of 30 kilometres, a distance error of 300 meters may be disregarded while for the range finder operating at the distance of 3 kilometres, such distance error is crucial, since in the first case distance measurement inaccuracy will be 1 % while in the second case it will be 10 %.
Alexander Onishko
Local time: 00:38
English translation:Paraphrase attempt
Explanation:
For example, when producing interference to a range finder that operates at a distance of 30 kilometers, a distance error of 300 meters may be disregarded, since it involves a deviation of only 1%. If the range finder is operating at a distance of 3 kilometers, a distance error of 300 meters is crucial, since the deviation is now 10%.

In general, my advice would be to avoid long sentences. Splitting them up will improve readability.

If you have a lot of text you want to have checked, you should post it as an editing job.
Selected response from:

vixen
Greece
Local time: 00:38
Grading comment
Thanks a lot !
4 KudoZ points were awarded for this answer

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Summary of answers provided
4 +2Paraphrase attempt
vixen
4No...
Tony M
5 -1Comment on the sentence
Sonia Gomes


  

Answers


17 mins   confidence: Answerer confidence 5/5 peer agreement (net): -1
Comment on the sentence


Explanation:
For example, take the case of producing interference to the range finder, which operates at the distance of 30 kilometres, in this case a distance error of 300 meters may be disregarded while for the range finder operating at a distance of 3 kilometres the distance error is crucial. In the first case distance measurement inaccuracy will be of 1 % while in the second case it will be of 10 %.

Hope this helps you

Regards

Sonia

Sonia Gomes
Local time: 03:08
Native speaker of: Native in EnglishEnglish, Native in PortuguesePortuguese
PRO pts in pair: 8

Peer comments on this answer (and responses from the answerer)
disagree  Cilian O'Tuama: take the case/in this case - reads badly; kilometREs/metERs ? inconsistent; 'at THE distance of 30' should be 'at A distance...'; 'inaccuracy of 1%' or 'inaccuracy will be 1%' (no 'of')... - pretty high confidence!?
11 mins
  -> Cilian, If you disagree with the way I have phrased the above sentence, there is no harm in it, we are here to learn and to help each other. But your sarcasm smacks of bad taste and you will agree totally not required at all. All the best Sonia

neutral  jebeen: Cilian is right in pointing out the errors, should not take it personally.
14 hrs
  -> Of course Cilian is right pointing out the errors, as I mentioned in my post we are here to learn, what I object to is is his sarcasm.
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23 mins   confidence: Answerer confidence 4/5Answerer confidence 4/5 peer agreement (net): +2
Paraphrase attempt


Explanation:
For example, when producing interference to a range finder that operates at a distance of 30 kilometers, a distance error of 300 meters may be disregarded, since it involves a deviation of only 1%. If the range finder is operating at a distance of 3 kilometers, a distance error of 300 meters is crucial, since the deviation is now 10%.

In general, my advice would be to avoid long sentences. Splitting them up will improve readability.

If you have a lot of text you want to have checked, you should post it as an editing job.

vixen
Greece
Local time: 00:38
Native speaker of: Native in DutchDutch
PRO pts in pair: 84
Grading comment
Thanks a lot !

Peer comments on this answer (and responses from the answerer)
agree  Vicky Papaprodromou
1 hr

agree  jebeen
14 hrs
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2 hrs   confidence: Answerer confidence 4/5Answerer confidence 4/5
No...


Explanation:
For example, on a range-finder operating at a range of 30km, interference generated that produces an error of 300m can be disregarded, whilst on a range-finder operating at a range of 3km, such a distance error would be crucial. In the first instance, the distance measurement error would be 1%, whilst in the second it would be 10%.

Tony M
France
Local time: 23:38
Native speaker of: Native in EnglishEnglish
PRO pts in pair: 3246
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