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Poetry with a tune: "Translation of Lyrics" » English to Arabic » Entry by Noura Tawil

 
 

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Translation by Noura Tawil (#14830) — Winner

Sunday Mornin' Comin' Down

Well, I woke up Sunday morning
With no way to hold my head that didn't hurt.
And the beer I had for breakfast wasn't bad,
So I had one more for dessert.
Then I fumbled in my closet through my clothes
And found my cleanest dirty shirt.
Then I washed my face and combed my hair
And stumbled down the stairs to meet the day.

I'd smoked my mind the night before
With cigarettes and songs I'd been picking.
But I lit my first and watched a small kid
Playing with a can that he was kicking.
Then I walked across the street
And caught the Sunday smell of someone's frying chicken.
And Lord, it took me back to something that I'd lost
Somewhere, somehow along the way.

On a Sunday morning sidewalk,
I'm wishing, Lord, that I was stoned.
'Cause there's something in a Sunday
That makes a body feel alone.
And there's nothing short a' dying
That's half as lonesome as the sound
Of the sleeping city sidewalk
And Sunday morning coming down.

In the park I saw a daddy
With a laughing little girl that he was swinging.
And I stopped beside a Sunday school
And listened to the songs they were singing.
Then I headed down the street,
And somewhere far away a lonely bell was ringing,
And it echoed through the canyon
Like the disappearing dreams of yesterday.

On a Sunday morning sidewalk,
I'm wishing, Lord, that I was stoned.
'Cause there's something in a Sunday
That makes a body feel alone.
And there's nothing short a' dying
That's half as lonesome as the sound
Of the sleeping city sidewalk
And Sunday morning coming down.


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Discussion about Poetry with a tune: "Translation of Lyrics" in English to Arabic - Entry #14830

Marcelle Nassif  Identity Verified
Lebanon
Member (2008)
English to Arabic
+ ...
Great translation Feb 13, 2014

Certainly not an easy text to translate but the Arabic translation came out as smooth and poetic as can be. Bravo Noura!

 

Morano El-Kholy  Identity Verified
Egypt
Local time: 03:05
Member (2011)
English to Arabic
+ ...
CONGRATULATIONS. Feb 14, 2014

A very great work and a big exerted effort.

Congratulations...

Hoping all the best for you my dear colleague Noura in your future career.

Kindest regards.


 

yelhajj
Local time: 05:05
English to Arabic
+ ...
My version of the first part Feb 17, 2014

I was late to enter a translation, but I think when translating a poem, the translator shall add a bit of his own imagination to give the poem a twist and make it more appealing to the native reader.

Here is my Arabic version of the first part, what do you think?

على وقع صوت صباح الأحد
أفقت بألم يصدع رأسي يهد الجسد
وكأس نبيذ كان فطوري، ولذ طعاماً
فحليت بعد الفطور بثانٍ علاه الزبد


 

Noura Tawil  Identity Verified
Syria
Local time: 03:05
Member (2013)
English to Arabic
+ ...
A Late Thank You! Aug 31, 2014

Dear Marcelle and Morano,
I have no idea how did I miss this thread since the "February 2014 Translation Contest", and only came across it now as I was looking for something in the forums!

My deepest appreciation for your sweet words, thank you!

Indeed, the text was challenging, and all the historical dilemmas about translating poetry & lyrics were present in my mind during every step of the way. It took me almost two days of work to "c
... See more
Dear Marcelle and Morano,
I have no idea how did I miss this thread since the "February 2014 Translation Contest", and only came across it now as I was looking for something in the forums!

My deepest appreciation for your sweet words, thank you!

Indeed, the text was challenging, and all the historical dilemmas about translating poetry & lyrics were present in my mind during every step of the way. It took me almost two days of work to "compose" the translation, preceded by several days of listening to all the song versions that I could find on the internet, absorbing the soul of the song, and thinking, then rethinking, of the possible translations that would be best to keep an acceptable balance between accuracy and quality. The song was still playing in my mind several days after submitting my entry, and I was affected by a blackish mood!

I never felt it was finished, to be honest. And kept trying to improve it until the last few minutesicon_smile.gif

Thanks again for all who rated and voted professionally and honestly, and to all the colleagues who voted for meicon_wink.gif

Best wishes,
Noura
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