Glossary entry (derived from question below)
English term or phrase:
for yourself
English answer:
work (this history) out in your own mind (without input from others)
Added to glossary by
Yvonne Gallagher
Oct 31, 2019 15:12
4 yrs ago
5 viewers *
English term
for yourself
English
Other
General / Conversation / Greetings / Letters
reflection on attachment history and ability to show up
Dear colleagues,
I’m not sure I’ve understood correctly the phrase “for yourself” right at the end of the passage below, taken from a parenting book.
Does it perhaps refer to “show up”, in the sense of “showing up for yourself” (before, the text says: show up for your kids…). Or maybe, does it mean “for your own good”?
Thank you so much for your patience!
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If your parents failed to show up for you, or showed up only sometimes, or behaved in scary and damaging ways, that doesn’t mean you can’t be there for your own kids in healthy and constructive ways. But it does mean you may have some work to do in terms of reflecting on your own attachment history and determining the kind of attachment you want to provide your own children. You can actually choose the extent to which you show up for your kids, and yes, you can build your own capacity to show up by examining your history and making sense of it *** for yourself. ***
I’m not sure I’ve understood correctly the phrase “for yourself” right at the end of the passage below, taken from a parenting book.
Does it perhaps refer to “show up”, in the sense of “showing up for yourself” (before, the text says: show up for your kids…). Or maybe, does it mean “for your own good”?
Thank you so much for your patience!
*******************************
If your parents failed to show up for you, or showed up only sometimes, or behaved in scary and damaging ways, that doesn’t mean you can’t be there for your own kids in healthy and constructive ways. But it does mean you may have some work to do in terms of reflecting on your own attachment history and determining the kind of attachment you want to provide your own children. You can actually choose the extent to which you show up for your kids, and yes, you can build your own capacity to show up by examining your history and making sense of it *** for yourself. ***
Change log
Nov 5, 2019 16:03: Yvonne Gallagher Created KOG entry
Responses
+7
9 mins
Selected
referring to "making sense of it for yourself"
not referring to "showing up" but to examining your own history, and understanding that so you can then "build your own capacity to show up"
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Note added at 14 mins (2019-10-31 15:27:00 GMT)
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because it's referring back to this
"you may have some work to do in terms of reflecting on your own attachment history" (and [THEREBY] determining the kind of attachment you want to provide your own children)
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Note added at 15 mins (2019-10-31 15:28:39 GMT)
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so first you need to understand...
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Note added at 33 mins (2019-10-31 15:46:14 GMT)
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no need to rephrase. It's merely emphasising that YOU must work this out in your own mind (without input from others), so yes, on your own
https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/think-fo...
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Note added at 5 days (2019-11-05 16:01:45 GMT) Post-grading
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glad to have helped
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Note added at 14 mins (2019-10-31 15:27:00 GMT)
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because it's referring back to this
"you may have some work to do in terms of reflecting on your own attachment history" (and [THEREBY] determining the kind of attachment you want to provide your own children)
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 15 mins (2019-10-31 15:28:39 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
so first you need to understand...
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Note added at 33 mins (2019-10-31 15:46:14 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
no need to rephrase. It's merely emphasising that YOU must work this out in your own mind (without input from others), so yes, on your own
https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/think-fo...
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Note added at 5 days (2019-11-05 16:01:45 GMT) Post-grading
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glad to have helped
Note from asker:
Thank you, Yvonne! but how would you rephrase "for yourself"? maybe "on your own"? of for your own good? |
Thank you so much, Yvonne! And thanks to Phil, too! |
4 KudoZ points awarded for this answer.
Comment: "Thank you so much, Yvonne, for your valuable help! Many thanks also to all other participants!"
18 hrs
English term (edited):
making sense of it *** for yourself. ***
understanding it on your own
making sense of it *** for yourself. *** => understanding it on your own
Note from asker:
Thank you for your attempt! |
Peer comment(s):
neutral |
B D Finch
: That would have been "by yourself".// On your own = without help/in isolation. For yourself = for your own benefit/sake.
15 mins
|
IYO ??
|
-1
1 day 10 hrs
for your own sake, and theirs
Rather than this being "show up for yourself", it's saying that you can show up for your kids better by processing your own history, which in turn benefits your kids because you're parenting in a better place psychologically.
Example sentence:
I dealt with the ghosts of the past, for my own sake and that of my children.
Note from asker:
Thank you, Lara, for your contribution! |
Peer comment(s):
disagree |
Yvonne Gallagher
: You're dealing with the whole paragraph instead of "examining your history and making sense of it for yourself"
3 days 10 hrs
|
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