Tony M Aug 22, 2012:

I understand Patent language is very special, and often sounds like gobbledy-gook!

However, even in patents, it's sometimes important to get away from a FR construction that comes over as awkward in EN, and we still need to obey some of the basic principles, even if they take us away from slavishly literal (and always providing they don't actually change the meaning, of course!)

One of my guiding principles, if I seek to use what sounds to me like a more natural expression in EN that doesn't however quite literally correspond to the expression used in FR, is to ask myself "Why might the writer have chosen to express it this way rather than that?" Sometimes, the answer is simply that there is a greater choice of expression in EN that simply does not exist in FR; in that case, I have no compunction about using my preferred expression, which the FR writer might well have used had it been available to her/him. However, if this is not the case, I reflect at greater length on why the writer chose to express it the way they did...

Louisa Tchaicha (asker) Aug 22, 2012:

yes it is a patent that's why I try to be as literal as possible, no I definitely wouldn't say "spaced apart" in real life, I translate patents mostly, that's why maybe the english in my proposed translations may sound awkward, but English is my mother tongue.

Tony M Aug 22, 2012:

spaced apart In fact, it is arguably a pleonasm to say 'spaced apart from each other' — if there are two things, and they are 'spaced apart', then by definition it has to be 'from each other'! (unless otherwise specified, of course)
In normal, everyday EN I would be tempted to leave it out; however, as your text seems a bit like a patent, a certain degree of redundancy for emphasis may be desirable.

Tony M Aug 22, 2012:

the / these / those Loulou, it is very common between FR > EN to find the definite article sits more comfortably as a demonstrative in EN — this is one of those key points in getting away from slavishly following the FR construction, and making it sound natural in EN. There are countless other examples of this kind of subtlety, just the sort of points that betray the fact that one has stuck too close to the original.

Only the other week, I was myself reproached for sticking too close to the FR original; but in that instance, as I explained, it was impossible to get further away from it without starting all over again with copywriting the whole text, which was appallingly badly written (and above all structured) in the first place!

Louisa Tchaicha (asker) Aug 22, 2012:

@Daryo thanks, I'll change the "from one another", I know it may sound funny, but I put "the" insteda of "these" because the French doesn't say "ces deux bases".

Daryo Aug 22, 2012:

just an other option, yours is fine.
"Preferably, the chassis exhibits a tubular structure comprising two bases spaced apart from each other, and spurs connecting these two bases together.