Sep 14, 2007 15:24
17 yrs ago
1 viewer *
German term
United Kingdom
For the Love of Language
Native in: English
Works in: German to English, French to English
unbewegt durchschneiden
German to English
Art/Literary
Poetry & Literature
fantasy novel
I really want to check whether I've understood this sentence correctly, though that's the bit that's causing me trouble.
"Es war ein sehr guter Dolch. Stabil, mit einer scharfen Klinge, die eine herabfallende Feder unbewegt ohne Weiteres durchschnitt."
So far I've got: " It was a very good dagger. Sturdy and with a blade so sharp that were a feather to fall on it, it would be instantly sliced in two."
Does this seem like a reasonable translation?
"Es war ein sehr guter Dolch. Stabil, mit einer scharfen Klinge, die eine herabfallende Feder unbewegt ohne Weiteres durchschnitt."
So far I've got: " It was a very good dagger. Sturdy and with a blade so sharp that were a feather to fall on it, it would be instantly sliced in two."
Does this seem like a reasonable translation?
Proposed translations
(English)
| 4 +3 | (you understood unbewegt correctly) |
Craig Meulen
|
| 2 +3 | either yours is correct or it happened |
Henry Whittlesey Schroeder
|
| 3 | without moving a finger |
Vito Smolej
|
Proposed translations
+3
37 mins
Selected
(you understood unbewegt correctly)
So how about this for a *completely* ambiguous but nonetheless elegant translation to cover any eventuality.
>
It was a very good dagger. Sturdy and with a blade sharp enough to slice through a falling feather.
<
Grammatically speaking my sentence doesn't determine whether it happened or not!! It also doesn't strictly capture the 'unbewegt', because it is also ambiguous as to whether the dagger was moved to slice the feather. BUT, this is OK, because the image is conveyed anyway.
And even if you do swipe at a falling feather with a dagger, it has to be sharp, otherwise it just pushes the feather without cutting. (Don't try that one at home on your own, children!)
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 44 mins (2007-09-14 16:09:32 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
Maybe removing the 'through' reduces the sense of movement, making it a little more 'unbewegt':
>
It was a very good dagger. Sturdy and with a blade sharp enough to slice a falling feather.
<
>
It was a very good dagger. Sturdy and with a blade sharp enough to slice through a falling feather.
<
Grammatically speaking my sentence doesn't determine whether it happened or not!! It also doesn't strictly capture the 'unbewegt', because it is also ambiguous as to whether the dagger was moved to slice the feather. BUT, this is OK, because the image is conveyed anyway.
And even if you do swipe at a falling feather with a dagger, it has to be sharp, otherwise it just pushes the feather without cutting. (Don't try that one at home on your own, children!)
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 44 mins (2007-09-14 16:09:32 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
Maybe removing the 'through' reduces the sense of movement, making it a little more 'unbewegt':
>
It was a very good dagger. Sturdy and with a blade sharp enough to slice a falling feather.
<
Peer comment(s):
| agree |
mill2
4 hrs
|
|
thanks
|
|
| agree |
Ken Cox
: my take as well. The idea of a falling feather being sliced in two by its own weight strikes me as highly unlikely, no matter how sharp the blade, but a blade sharp enough to cut through a falling feather without disturbing its motion is plausible.
4 hrs
|
|
"...highly unlikely" - Ken, it's a FANTASY novel ;-))
|
|
| agree |
Hilary Davies Shelby
: i really like your second attempt (without "through") - extremely elegant, even if you do say so yourself! ;-)))
21 hrs
|
|
Thanks, Hilary. Yes, false modesty is soo English, I'm trying out the opposite character traits for a while ... ;-)
|
4 KudoZ points awarded for this answer.
Comment: "I like the ambiguous version too!"
+3
8 mins
Henry Whittlesey Schroeder
United States
United States
Native in English
Specializes in field
United States
20 years of experience, certified, ATA
Native in: English (Variant: US) 
Works in: German to English, Russian to English, English
Related KudoZ points
:
88
either yours is correct or it happened
It's open to interpretation in my non-native opinion.
Either yours is correct or it really happened:
It was a very good dagger. Sturdy and with a blade so sharp that it sliced a falling feather right in two.
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 9 mins (2007-09-14 15:34:30 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
The "past tense" does incline me to think that the event did happen, a feather did fall on the dagger.
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 11 mins (2007-09-14 15:35:58 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
Wouldn't the German also use a conditional (durchschneiden würde) if it didn't happen, if it were hypothetical?
Either yours is correct or it really happened:
It was a very good dagger. Sturdy and with a blade so sharp that it sliced a falling feather right in two.
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 9 mins (2007-09-14 15:34:30 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
The "past tense" does incline me to think that the event did happen, a feather did fall on the dagger.
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 11 mins (2007-09-14 15:35:58 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
Wouldn't the German also use a conditional (durchschneiden würde) if it didn't happen, if it were hypothetical?
Peer comment(s):
| agree |
Dr. Fred Thomson
: Appears to have already happened
2 mins
|
|
Yeah, you think so too. I'm increasingly leaning toward that as well.
|
|
| agree |
Bernhard Sulzer
: the correct subjunct. form would be durchschnitte/durchschneiden würde; I take it as - ...was a dagger of the kind that cut through a falling feather without even moving (the dagger). But ...see my note to asker
8 hrs
|
| agree |
Sonali Hegde
: Yes, I also think that the author or whoever said it saw the feather slice into two
11 hrs
|
13 hrs
Vito Smolej
Germany
Germany
Germany
passion for technical excellence
Native in: Slovenian
Works in: English to Slovenian, German to Slovenian, Slovenian to English, and 1 more.
Related KudoZ points
:
4
without moving a finger
The original sentence is worth an entry in the bulwer-lytton ("...it was a dark and stormy night ...) contest. I am just adding my expert touch - h'll I could even write it myself.
Discussion